You can't motorboat a personality
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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