Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
