dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
