some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize