So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize