worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
