Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize