Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
