please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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