I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
