I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
