I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
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