they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
you mean i was at the winter classic?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
