you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I FOUND THE LEGS
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize