Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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