There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
