I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
