When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
