my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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