when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
