direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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