awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
birth control should be required to get into college
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize