It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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