I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
