You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
