For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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