that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
