no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
