I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I just sucked dick on a ferry
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
