i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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