i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
