i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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