Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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