I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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