Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
