Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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