Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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