I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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