Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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