that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
