"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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