And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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