found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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