East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
