I need help removing her.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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