honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
