Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
