The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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