Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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