Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
